Mr Head Pressure

Hi guys

Nothing much to report on these past few weeks. The dizziness is ever present (I don't think I need to bore you anymore with the vast symptoms list) you know how it is. I will say that the vertigo is at such level these past few couple of weeks that I have hardly stepped outside. I could if I really needed to but I just cannot be bothered walking down the street and have the visual world sway around me,disorientated and off balance. I have however kept to my now moderate exercise regime. I do 25 minutes a day regardless of how full pressured and dizzy my head is. Today is one of those days.I keep doing it hoping that the constant movement will correct this vertigo problem and also to make sure I at least move my body during the day. The rest of the time is spent wandering the house or sitting and lying down (head propped up of course).

It's a strange thing that the simplest of tasks such as walking, standing, turning, looking up and down and bending over are the hardest most disorientating things I can do to myself. Yet when I exercise the feelings,sensations and visual bouncing/jerking is still present but I move better and feel more in control. I don't know how to describe it. I think it has to do with not having to visually concentrate or focus on anything whilst exercising. I think my eyes get to relax (I don't know) and since I do it at home alone there is no noise or movement around me that would disorientate me further. It's difficult to describe. I guess exercise movements are more slow, controlled and intentional.To squat for example is a slow and almost mechanical movement. Whereas walking or turning quickly or simply responding and reacting to the normal everyday barrage of motion,visual input,auditory input that everyday life presents you is a constant assault on the brain and vestibular system.

Normal movement and cognitive response are achieved in a split second. It's automatic and natural. It is the automatic and unconscious  movements that are required in everyday life that I find impossible. For example I have to plan and am fully aware of every footstep I take in order to get from one room to the next. I am completely aware of every single head movement I make ( I need to be as one unconscious turn of the head may result in me swiftly darting left or right and possibly to my friend the ground). It is no way to live is it. Healthy people do not even consider such simple actions as they live day to day. Their vestibular system just works and in most cases I bet they are oblivious to having a vestibular system. So was I until May 2007. I personally feel like I move around like a badly weighted robot, To others I probably look like I am gliding effortlessly from room to room without a care in the world but the reality is I am bouncing off the surrounding walls and walking stormy seas. Sorry I am just waffling now. I wish I was more articulate.

Keep Going.

Swimmyhead