I have just this second finished a 30min cardio workout and to say I am sweating a little would be an understatement. The weather is glorious, sunny and hot but the heat made my workout extra hard. I have been battling to keep up with my workout routines lately, I mean I have done them all but I have been feeling a little sorry for myself during my workouts this week. I perform a lot of turns and punches whilst working out and of course every turn I make or every punch I throw causes the world in front of me to jerk and shift in my field of vision along with the awful head sensations that go along with the visual movement. Throughout I constantly have to keep myself from falling sideways and correct my balance. A workout is tough enough without having vertigo whilst doing it. I guess I hoped that all this movement would have corrected the balance issue a little more after a year of exercising, unfortunately not. I have spent all my late 20s and early 30s having to deal with this damn vertigo. I shouldn't have to feel like this at 33. I am supposedly in my prime. Some prime it is!
However I have much to be thankful for. If you have visited my website or read my previous posts here you will know that up until 12 months ago I had a job standing or walking never mind exercising. So it's a massive improvement really.
Since I am still constantly dizzy all day long I can sometimes forget just how much I have improved this past 12 months. It is simply because the level of vertigo on my better days that I live with now is still not good enough and still does not allow me to function normally. I am grateful for any improvement but I want the dizziness gone. Nobody should have to live with any level of dizziness. My consultant told me this. Any level of dizziness is simply not acceptable. Due to the erratic nature of my condition I have not learned to live with it and I never will. I want it gone. Sounds ridiculous I know, here I am writing a post about me working out surely I can function normally?
Nope I cannot. I just have very strong will power and push myself hard to exercise in the hope that my brain and balance will just sync up. This is what motivates me to workout feeling the way I do. It is not because I feel great, it is simply my need and want to get better and live life again.
Living with vestibular dysfunction whatever the cause is very very hard no matter what level you are effected by it.
You may have a mild or sporadic vestibular issue lasting a couple of
weeks or months or you may be hit very hard with a chronic problem
lasting years. Whatever the case, I am sure fellow sufferers will agree it is very
difficult condition to live with. I know people who have had a typical 2 week
vertigo problem then fortunately recovered. These people said it was the
worst thing they have ever experienced. I also remember reading
about a women who had beaten cancer and then developed a vestibular
problem (labyrinthitis I think). She said that her vestibular issue was
much much harder and made her feel much worse than the chemotherapy she had been through.
Evidently I am a mixture of emotions today. I came here to write about my workout and have ended up ranting.
Even after all the ranting, I have to say I am glad I worked out as it gives me a sense of satisfaction knowing that I am helping myself. I think I will give myself a slap on the back and say well done to myself. Well done for dealing with all I have dealt with these past 6 years, well done for always picking myself back up from those low moments, Well done for staying motivated and hopeful for a complete recovery regardless of how bad the vertigo, dizziness, vestibular rehab, medication side effects and exercise over the years have made me feel.
If you live with vertigo and dizziness which I guess you might since you found my blog then give yourself a slap on the back and say well done to yourself for coping. You will be hard pressed to find any sympathy or respect from others regarding this invisible illness. So give it it to yourself , respect yourself and say well done. Keep going.
Swimmyhead
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